The Most Popular Ice Cream Flavors, Ranked. Shutterstock. Love can sweep you off your feet and carry you along in a way you’ve never known before. But the ride always ends, and you end up feeling lonely and bitter.

Wait. It’s not love I’m describing. I’m thinking of a monorail.- Jack Handey. Love is a funny thing. Like why do we fall in love with one object of affection and not others? Is it just a biological, chemical reaction? Or is it fate? Do we stay true to our loves out of obligation? Loneliness? True devotion?

Sometimes I wonder if perhaps I’m just settling. Maybe I’m in love because I crave the familiar. Am I such a poor creature of habit that I can’t see how many better options are around me? Or is Baskin Robbins Cookie Dough Ice Cream truly the love of my life, as I have strongly believed for last two decades? Maybe it doesn’t make sense that I love Baskin Robbins so much, and that I truly believe it is the best ice cream on the planet. Part of me knows Baskin Robbins isn’t ‘good’ ice cream. Watch Roll Bounce Online Hollywoodreporter there. And yet, my heart burns for it with an all consuming passion.

We’re not always together. I’ve cheated many times, and there are periods in my life when a Baskin Robbins sits across a chasm too far to traverse. Or it’s winter, and societal convention, our cruel mistress, keeps us apart. But we write, and try to stay in touch. January 1. 0th, 2.

Dearest Baskin,My sweet, sugary angel. As I write this, I’m standing on the dock (our place!). Waves are crashing in the distance, and I’m looking up at the vast collection of stars glittering in the sky. You seem galaxies away. I wonder, are the same stars shimmering stars over the strip mall you reside? Probably, it’s only about two miles away. But still. I ache for you.

If only I could put your sweet vanilla on my tongue. The heat of my mouth would melt you into a puddle of pure ecstasy.

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Did your favorite ice cream make the cut or did we leave it out in the cold?

Do you miss my touch as much as I miss yours? Oh Baskin, tell me you yearn for me? Send me back the poetry of your soul as mine reaches across the divide.

Sincerely yours,Allison Noelle Sanchez January 1. Allison Sanchez,Please click the link below to confirm that you would like to be on our mailing list.

The Baskin Robbins Team. January 1. 0th, 2. My succulent Baskin!! Your words leave me flushed. You musn’t be so forward! What if father had intercepted our correspondence?

He would never have let me leave the house again! And rightly so, your tantalizing prose arouses feelings and things in me that well, I , as a young, innocent girl, never knew even existed. Yes, I want to be on your mailing list. I’ve never wanted anything more.

Every part of my mind screams that I am putting myself in danger, but every cell in my heart screams, “YES!” Put me on that list. Tell me every secret, every thought, every dream. But how shall I wait for our next correspondence?

Even a day is too long when we’re apart. Write soon, my sweet. Watch Shocking Blue Putlocker. I will be waiting. Eternally yours,Allison Noelle Sanchez. March 2. 1st, 2. 01. Allison Sanchez. Spring into the season! Buy one regular soft serve cone and get one free!

Limit one coupon per customer. Coupon must be presented at time of purchase. Shop must retain coupon. No substitutions allowed. FR-EE Pretty Woman Full Movie.

Void if copied or transferred and where prohibited or restricted by law. Customer must pay applicable tax.

Having trouble viewing this email? Click here. March 2. Baskin,Yes. I am having trouble VIEWING THIS EMAIL. Your sudden chilly demeanor vexes and confuses me. I don’t hear from you for weeks, and now, NOW, you write as if nothing unusual has transpired?

I thought you dead! I adorned myself in black as is the custom, and I mourned for you.

And now, you reappear, shameless, and with the demand that I must purchase something for your love? You say it’s a soft serve cone this time. But what will it be the next? Perfume from Paris? Diamonds? What will you require of me when all my riches are gone Baskin, when you’ve sucked the marrow from my bones, and I have nothing left to give you? You mention the law…like the cruel beast that you are.

You know how that hurts me, knowing that we can never be together because of society’s outdated codes. Because it’s ‘illegal to smash the window of a Baskin Robbins after closing time.’ So I sleep alone every night, aching for you. And yet, after all my sacrifice, you void our love? Erase the decades of memory, of joy, of pain? How dare you? How dare you toy with me like that? I give up. This will never work.

Shall it? Please ignore the tears that surely stain this parchment, the ink that runs with my sorrow. I am alone. But perhaps I always have been. Perhaps I imagined that you felt the same as I. Do not correspond with me again.

The pain is too much. I will let mother set me up with the ice cream shop down the road.

It’s well off, though…very old. But at least I know I will be well appointed. It is stable and kind. And… I must turn my back to this volatile path you have led us down, lest we both end up dead or ruined. Be well, my dearest. I will never love another, but perhaps, that is my….

I dream, our…. burden to bear. If I see you again, it will be in another life,Lady Sanchez.

May 7th, 2. 01. 7Allison Sanchez,Mother’s Day is May 1. Don’t forget to treat mom to something sweet! Take $3. 0. 0 off any ice cream cake on us! The Baskin Robbins Team. May 7th, 2. 01. 7Oh Baskin,You do care! I could never stay angry with you, my dearest.

Mother will love an ice cream cake, you’re so very thoughtful. And I…. I will love you until time itself folds in, collapses, and our universe fades from existence. Even if I must wait out the fabric of space and time, I shall wait for you my love. The way the spring must wait for the sun to melt the icy snow, so shall I keep the course.

And maybe I’ll see you in my dreams or on my birthday. I have that coupon you sent for a free 2. So…it won’t be long.

Though any separation seems endless. With undying devotion,Yours once again,Allison Noelle Sanchez. Point being, Love isn’t rational, but it is beautiful. Ice cream is a wondrous thing. But cruel. It nourishes us and yet, wrecks our very souls and waistlines. But we must admit that not all ice cream is created equal.

I will hold that Baskin tastes the best forever. But beyond the brands of ice cream in the world. I have some very important, very strong feelings about flavor. Hopefully we all do. Wouldn’t it be great if the next world war was fought, not about religion or borders, but over ice cream flavors? And yes, we’ll ALL die. But wouldn’t it be more whimsical if we all died in an atomic apocalypse because we just couldn’t agree on mint chocolate chip vs.

If brother turned against brother because one of them wanted chocolate and the other cookies and cream? That’s the only world that I want my children to grow up in.

Here are the most popular ice cream flavors POWER RANKED. Our rating system today will be “I scream, you scream, this woman screams for ice cream like her very life depends on it.

AND IT DOES!”Shutterstock. Strawberry. There’s nothing bad about strawberry ice cream. It’s perfectly delicious, I’m sure. It’s just like…. have you ever been with someone who has ordered strawberry ice cream? Ever? I’m not even sure what would happen if you did. Is it a code for some sort of secret society that exists below every ice cream parlor?

You ask for a strawberry cone and they usher you into a back closet that turns into an elevator and takes you to a secret group of assassins who operate outside the laws of man? Or maybe it’s a test, to see if you’re human or not. Perhaps ice cream parlors are a group of international demon hunters, and the “strawberry ice cream test” is a classic ruse to find out who amongst us are horrible demons wearing the skin of human hosts. Order one scoop of delicious strawberry ice cream, and they know you couldn’t possibly be a real person. Who does that? Within seconds you’ll be doused with holy water and your head sliced off with whatever specially blessed blade sends demons back to the depths of Hell.

More Reasons I No Longer Date Black Women – Return Of Kings. When I wrote the prequel to this column a little over a year ago I predictably received my share of “fan mail” from angry sistas and their army of sexless simps. I was called a sellout, race traitor, and every other typical insult they could think of. Being the ball busting bastard I am, I’ve decided to add another installment. This one will be a little different in that I’ll address some of the ringing endorsements I received from the so- called “black community” at large for my blasphemy.

They are not submissive. This one is a sub- category of their lack of femininity I touched on in the first article.

The bottom line here is that they refuse to cater to their men (or maybe they just don’t know how) and get extremely huffy when there’s a hint of authority in your voice when giving them instructions. A quick example: In my fledgling stages of implementing red pill game, I was on my way to pick up this chick I’d been seeing for a couple weeks. I called her up and said “Get dressed, I’m on my way.”She responded by saying “Tch…. I’ll get dressed when I want to.” I was a little surprised at her response (remember, I was still a tadpole level player) but the more of them I dated the more of a pattern this seemed to become.‘Strong black women’ don’t respond well to authoritative men. For whatever reason black women take exception to being told what to do. It’s as though it triggers an involuntary rebellious response that tells them to push back regardless of the circumstances. According to a couple of my buddies, this is one of the leading reasons fights start with them in the first place.

They “value” black men because we’re their only option. Coming to the realization she’ll attract very few men outside her race. Men with options aren’t about to be some woman’s backup plan.

Black women are always complaining about black men on something or another. Among the most popular is “Black men don’t value us like we value them.”Hypergamy knows no color or race.

If white men, the men highest on the totem pole in terms of SMV, were to show more interest in black women, sisters would jump ship in a New York minute. All women aim to consolidate on the highest value male they can find, skin tone be damned. Athlone Mc. Ginnis did a piece a while back on why black women love the TV show Scandal. The show’s main character, Olivia Pope, is a black woman who is a crisis management expert, specifically in the field of politics. She begins a torrid affair with the President, who is white, despite the fact that a high value black man, Edison Davis, is all but throwing himself at her. Red pill aware black men don’t hate on stuff like this. We understand the game. This comes as no surprise to the unplugged as we have a good working knowledge of a woman’s imperative.

The truth is, if the President of that show were black and Edison white, Olivia would still be fucking the President. Women are attracted to the highest status males they have access to, regardless of race, and Pope is no exception. Professional athletes like De. Marco Murray, Robert Griffin III, and Tiger Woods catch heat from black women for marrying or dating white women (or a woman who isn’t black).

But where’s all their anger and outrage over celebrities like Stacey Dash, Halle Berry, or Zoe Saldana for marrying outside their race? Where’s all the outrage?

It doesn’t exist because they understand that snagging the highest value male is part of the game. Unfortunately they don’t seem to want to acknowledge the pendulum swings both ways. At this point it’s safe to say that as far as black females are concerned, black men are a static “Plan B.”3. They don’t give head. Ahhh, the elephant in the room.

It’s common knowledge that when it comes to the task of a woman getting on her knees, black girls seem to be allergic to fellatio. Even in my beta days when I was fucking them left and right, I can only remember a few of them giving me head and that’s probably an overstatement. Women know giving up the booty is easy. But a blowjob is the most submissive thing a she can do for a man. Being a “strong and independent black woman” doesn’t allow her relinquish that power to a man. I’m fairly certain that if word got out that they’ve started following in the footsteps of their Hispanic, Asian, Indian, and : :: gasp: :: Caucasian sisters and started using their mouths to pleasure men, they’d probably start getting more attention for this reason alone.

Don’t get me wrong—I’m sure there are men out there who don’t mind not getting head from their women. But I’m not one of them, nor will I ever be. They don’t know their place. Thanks to ridiculous television shows and Tyler Perry movies, black women seem to think they, not their men or husbands, should be the head of household. They honestly believe they should handle all the finances and make all the important decisions. If challenged, they retaliate with a loud rebuttal that is nothing short of condescending.

No need to wonder where his headache is coming from. A good friend of mine back east is a retired cop (I mentioned him around the mid point of this article) whose best friend and lifelong partner on the force is black. There was never a shortage of stories he’d tell us about his friend’s wife getting all up in arms when Harrison, his partner, made even the smallest purchase without her consent. Obviously Harrison had neither the game, nor the respect to quell his wife’s behavior. But no matter how much game a man has, it’s a constant uphill battle dealing with a woman who believes it is her birthright to be in charge.

Men with options simply aren’t going to deal with women who are bossy bitches. Period. 1. Their expectations are WAY too high. This dude better be rich or he’s gettin’ no play. The movie Something New coined a new acronym that quickly permeated the mindset of black females everywhere: I. B. M. or Ideal Black Man. Basically, an “IBM” is tall, great looking, makes six figures, drives a luxury vehicle, lives in a penthouse in the city, and has washboard abs to boot.

To be fair, most Western females have these expectations, but black women act more entitled to this mythical man than any other race. It amazes me how women who act mannish, don’t know their roles as women, and don’t suck dick are the most outraged they don’t have dozens of Morris Chestnuts beating down their doors.“Fan Mail”I’m pretty sure there are a few black women reading this who are snarling at their screens right as well as a few black men pretending to be outraged (brothers, stop lying to yourselves….

I posted the first installment. To get your creative juices going and continue the “debate” (because surely attraction can be negotiated right?) I’ve decided to address the typical mud slinging that happens with columns like these: “You hate yourself!”Typical projection play. Black women hate themselves because they’re not preferred by the vast majority of men (and who can blame them) so they use the straw man “self hate” argument to deflect their pain. They simply want to make themselves feel better about to fact that the men who used to want to fuck them are finding greener pastures with other breeds of female by telling us we ‘hate’ ourselves. Any man getting regular sex from females who aren’t masculine a live for going down on him is far from hating himself. I speak from personal experience.“You can’t handle a strong black woman!”Putting up with a bossy, mannish woman who wakes up with an attitude problem is something I don’t tolerate with any woman.

You want to show me strength? Embrace true femininity, and then channel it. I’ll manhandle you all you want.“How can you bad mouth black women when you were raised by one?”Easy.